Movement vs. Moment

Sometimes those instructors at Hot House Yoga have the unique ability to say something that resonates so deeply within me that my world is rocked...That is to say it strikes a chord of a truth I’ve always known but am only now beginning to feel. Knowing something and feeling something is as different as a rock and feather. It's the brain in movement versus the being in the moment. For example, the instructor reminded us that our intentions are usually best when they are formulated absent want or desire… So I’ve begun to move away from “Today I want to touch my toes,” or “Today I want to feel aware the entire class,” and am moving to things like, “I am grateful for this opportunity,” and “I am grateful for the calm I feel throughout my day,” or “I am grateful for a strong and able body,” and “I am grateful for the new awareness and consciousness I feel.” I’m starting to realize the limitations of living in the past or future and the freedom of the NOW. I’m beginning to realize the beauty of silence—rather, the importance of silence. A passage was read in during class today and I feel obligated to share it. In Stillness Speaks, Eckart Tolle writes:

Any disturbing noise can be as helpful as silence. How? By dropping your inner resistance to the noise, by allowing it to be as it is, this acceptance also takes you into that realm of inner peace that is stillness. Whenever you deeply accept this moment as it is—no matter what form it takes—you are still, you are at peace.

Jackpot. I remember last December discussing with a childhood friend the frustrations I felt because I didn’t feel as though I was at peace like we were when we were kids. Part of me acknowledges that that’s reality—that that’s what happens when we grow up—but another huge part of me was asking why this was the case. Why when we get excited, is there less squeeling with excitement than before? Why do we always have to be doing something even when we're not doing something? Why are we always, always thinking in an obsessive manner? Maybe I’m projecting, maybe it’s just me… but where have the listless and carefree energies of our youth gone? This is only my opinion, but I think it’s because we live in a society where we our conditioned to go, go, go, think, think, think, look forward, look on, look ahead… Because of this most of us can only find peace in solitude; we can only find peace if we physically step away. I’m starting to realize now that I do not have to remove myself from a situation. Additionally, I do not have to stop thinking about the future entirely… I merely have to seek the inner peace within me an inner peace that is always within me. I just have to be aware of it, tap into it, and allow myself to feel it. I need to allow that inner peace to take over all the time... that is where I want to live my life from.